just felt like updating.

ive been on an emotional rollercoaster ride. the rails broke down and sent everyone flying. i smashed into a rock wall and died.

im such a bad person. i don't know how or can't repay people the help i've got from them. i suck at making friends. and even if i do make friends with people, its super hard for me to keep in contact and all that bullshit. people see me as.. just another guy.. and oh where was he when i needed someone. where was he? who? that guy? who? who the hell is he? who? bah. it looks like im ill fated to be with myself. talk to myself. sleep with myself. or go to school with myself. 4 life. oh im not even that close to my family. i dont even really talk to them. i lock myself in this fucked up room of mine and just drift away into insanity.. like i can just stare at the monitor for a full hour without doing anything thats just wasting my time when i can do something else you know what im talking about like school and how the hell to move on when you really really really really care for someone you love and cherish while that person doesnt or pick up a skill like how to make a fork into a spoon or make alcohol out of a table knife, some butter and strawberry jam or make a business on how to sell your mom's underwear and join the apprentice and work for donald trump or how to be a worthless retard. oh wait. im already one.

at least i was on the same ride with you.